


Oh, But That One Night

by gatergirl79



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Episode Tag, Episode: s01e01 Pilot, Flashbacks, Gay Bar, Gay Steve McGarrett, M/M, One Night Stand, Pre-Season/Series 01, U.S. Navy SEALs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-09-02 20:18:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16794010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gatergirl79/pseuds/gatergirl79
Summary: Returning to Hawaii for his father's funeral, Steve McGarrett thinks he sees a familiar face across the street, but there was no way in hell it could really be Danny, the man he'd last seen five years previous.





	Oh, But That One Night

**Author's Note:**

> This story has been gathering dust on my computer for years now. Not because it’s unfinished, but because I wanted to finish the follow up fic before posting, then I got distracted with other stuff. The follow up still isn’t finished, but maybe posting will force me to do it. 
> 
> Anyway; basically since I first heard Drive By, this story was in my head. I checked online but didn’t find what I was looking for, so I decided the only option was to write it myself. If you’ve heard the song then you obviously know the basic plot of this story. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy.

Steve stared out at the ocean. It had been years since he’d set foot on home sand, and he never expected that the only thing that would bring him back would be the murder of his father. Inhaling slowly he rubbed at his eyes, fighting back yet more tears. The years of estrangement, the things left unsaid, the regret and resentment all weighing down on him. He felt as if he were being crushed.

Turning away from the bright blue ocean filled with memories of a once happy family, he glanced around, hoping for a distraction. What he found had his heart flying into his throat. Off in the distance, between the thick crowds of tourists, a blur of dove-soft blonde hair, glowing like a halo in the Hawaiian sun.

A tingle rippled through his fingers, causing them to twitch from the memory of how it had felt, the phantom scent of sweat and aftershave filling his nostrils. Steve’s chest tightened and he took a step forward, heart racing.

Then he blinked and the vision vanished. Stretching to his full height, Steve scanned the area, swallowing thickly when he found nothing but strangers.

With a regretful sigh, Steve turned back to the ocean, his thoughts drifting back six years, when he’d risked everything for one night.

___(*_*)___

_New York, 2004_

Steve knew it was a bad idea. He knew if he was seen he could lose everything he’d spent the past five years working towards, but he wanted to celebrate, and as much as hanging out with his training buddies was fun, he needed to let loose. One last time before he gave himself over to Navy regulations forever.

He’d done the same thing just after graduating Annapolis, before signing his final papers that would take away his freedom, he’d gone out and had one night with a nameless stranger. Then he’d gone back to the Navy and become just like everyone else, burying this part of him deep as it would go.

But the years of denial, of pretending not to feel things, had gotten too much. He needed a release. Just once.

Pausing outside the club, he stared at the door. The point of no return. Once he crossed that threshold, he was putting his career on the line. If someone saw him, there was a chance he could lose it all. He considered turning back, thought about the anger and shame that would be written over Joe and his father’s faces, then stepped off the curb. Inhaling slowly he crossed the street, marching with confidence into the club.

The music was typically loud. A pumping beat that made it impossible to speak to anyone. Not that anyone there wanted to indulge in a conversation. This whole place was about meeting a stranger, getting up close and personal with them, and then, if you were lucky taking them home for a night of no strings attached sex. Everyone was there for the same reason Steve was.

Heading over to the bar, Steve calmly ordered a beer, turning to scan the ocean of bodies in front of him. Hoping someone might catch his interest. It wasn’t until he got bored and turned to lean on the bar, that he noticed the guy beside him. His head was lowered over a beer, which he gripped tightly between both his small large hands. – Not as large as his own, but perfectly in proportion with the rest of the man’s body. Which in and of itself had peeked Steve’s interest.

He licked his lips, lifting his bottle to take a small sip to wet his throat, before leaning closer to the blonde stranger and shouting over the music, “You don’t look like you’re having a good time.”

The guy's head snapped around to stare up at him, brow raised. Then he turned to look over his shoulder at their surroundings, as if only just realising where he was. “I guess I’m not in the mood.” He huffed before turning back to his beer. “Maybe you should find someone else to hit on.”

Steve couldn’t stop the smirk crawling across his face. “Who says I’m hitting on you? - I was just stating a fact.”

The guy looked up at him disbelievingly. “So this isn’t you attempting to be charming?”

“No.” Steve lied, shaking his head nonchalantly with a soft smile.

“Good, because you’re failing miserably.”

Steve chuckled, something in his chest swelling at the reply. “You’re _still_ here.”

The blond rolled his eyes and went back to his drink. “I don’t know why. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking coming to a place like this.”

“I’ll go out on a limb and say you’re here for the same reason as the rest of us. Looking to get laid. - Otherwise you’d be at a nice Irish bar somewhere.”

The stranger twisted his body a little, “What makes you think I’m Irish?”

Scanning the man’s body, “Just a guess. - I’m Steve.”

“Isn’t the point of nameless hook-ups in gay bars, to be….you know, _nameless_?”

Steve snorted, shrugging. “Well I can’t call you short, hot and blond all night.”

The guy turned to fully face Steve. “Firstly, I’m only short compared to you because you’re freakishly tall.”

“I’m not _freakishly_ tall, I’m six foot. That’s considered average nowadays.”

“Nowadays? Really?” the guy smirked. “Secondly, I thought you _weren’t_ hitting on me?”

“A guy can change his mind.” Steve murmured into his beer, his eyes never leaving the stranger. He felt a wave of warmth as a small reluctant smile snuck across the man’s face.

“Look babe, I’m really not in the mood for this okay. I came to get drunk and forget that my divorce came through. - I’m not even gay.”

Steve’s light-hearted mood cooled and he shifted in his place. “So why come to a gay bar?”

The stranger shrugged, dragging his hand through his hair. “I….have no fucking idea. - Probably because it’s the last place my brother will come looking for me.”

Steve stared down at him for a long moment. His whole reason for being there was to get laid. To have one last hurrah before he had to go back to lying to the world. He wasn’t here to play therapist to some stranger, no matter how cute he was. – And yet….

Somehow he couldn’t bring himself to move. There was something about this guy that had him glued to the spot. He waved at the bartender, indicating two more beers for him and his new friend.

“Did you not hear me?” the stranger asked, glaring at him. “I’m _not_ gay. I’m _not_ interested.”

“I heard. - So….divorce?” He pressed, paying for the drinks and pushing over the fresh beer. “How long were you married?”

The blond stared at him silently, lips pressed in a thin line, watching Steve suspiciously.

“Look. You’re in a gay bar, for whatever reason. If you stand here alone, I won’t be the only guy hitting on you, so talk to me, no expectations, and they’ll leave you alone.”

“Aren’t you here to get _laid_? Won’t standing here with me cramp your style?” he looked Steve up and down. “Not that you have much. Who the hell wears cargo pants to a night club?”

“Says the guy in a tie?” Steve smirked.

“Hey, ties are classy.”

“And can be used for all kinds of fun things.” the bartender interrupted with a wink as he passed, clearly catching the tail end of their conversation.

Steve chuckled tightly. His throat closing up as his eyes were drawn to the grey tie hanging from his companion’s neck. Sudden images of a slated headboard and hot, sweaty….

“I think you should go find your hook-up.” The blonde interrupted, eyes boring into Steve. He shifted uncomfortably on the stool and dropped his gaze to Steve’s cargos, only for his head to snap up again, flushed.

Steve couldn’t help but grin, as he subtly adjusted himself. “Sorry. - Look. How about this, if I see someone I like the look of, I’ll dump your ass right here and go. It’ll kinda be like you’re my wingman. What you say?”

The blond watched him, silent, his fingers picking at the label on his bottle.

“And I’ll promise not to have any inappropriate thoughts about…. _ties_.” Steve grinned goofily as red flooded his new friends face.

The stranger narrowed his eyes at Steve, then reluctantly nodded. “Fine. - Name’s Danny.” He held out his hand, and Steve took it quickly. Fighting the thrill that went through him at the first touch of Danny’s skin.

“So you gonna answer my question? How long were you married?” Steve asked, turning his body so he was leaning his back against the bar, making a show of watching the crowd. Even though all he could actually concentrate on was Danny’s voice, and his body heat.

“Married, six years. Together eight.”

“Sorry.” Steve sighed sympathetically. “Kids?”

“Daughter. She’s five.”

“That’s got to be hard.” Steve looked forlornly at Danny.

“It is. Gracie’s my whole life. The last year’s been a fucking nightmare. Being apart from her.”

Steve nodded, remaining silent. After all what could he say? Other than what Danny clearly didn’t want to hear. That the best way to get over an ex, is to dance with a stranger. – Wait, where had he heard that before.

They stood silently, drinking their beers. Steve’s mind trying to figure out why that line sounded so familiar. _Three men and a baby._ His mind eventually clarified, just as Danny opened his mouth to speak.

“What about you? Married….shit, stupid question.” He rolled his eyes.

Steve chuckled. “Why is it a stupid question? How do you know I’m not living a secret life?” which was as close to the truth as Steve was able, or willing to share.

Danny’s eyes burned into his, a clear look of disapproval, and Steve exhaled a long breath, “Not unless you count being married to my work. No. - No kids either before you ask.”

Danny nodded, eyes still searching Steve’s face. “Boyfriend?”

“Would I be here if I had a boyfriend?”

Danny shrugged. “Never know. You guys are all open when it comes to relationships right? You‘re together but you still sleep with other people?”

Steve stared at him, mouth hanging open, eyes wide. “Way to buy into the cliché there Danny.”

Danny flushed, shuffling on his stool. “I just…” he gave a half-hearted shrug and sighed, “I don’t know any gay guys, okay?”

Steve took pity on him, chuckling. “Of course it’s only a cliché because it’s true. - Not completely. I mean not every gay guy is a commitment-phobe.” Not that Steve was talking from experience. Hell this last ten minutes talking to Danny was probably the longest relationship he’d had in his life. “But they are a little more….free and easy when it comes to sex.”

“They?” Danny lifted a brow. “Meaning you’re not like that?”

Steve cleared his throat and waved for two more bottles. “I can’t say. - I’ve never had a relationship.” He confessed despite himself. There was something about Danny that had him spilling his guts so easily. Joe would be ashamed of him after all those weeks training to resist interrogation and torture.

“You’ve never had a relationship? _Ever_?” Danny’s eyes widened in shock, blindly handing over the money to the bartender.

Steve shrugged. “Dated a girl in high school before I got shipped off to Annapolis.”

“Annapolis? Like the Navy?”

Steve swallowed with a shrug, and grabbed his beer. He took a large gulp and turned his attention to the dance floor, heart pounding in his chest. Why the fuck had he said that?

“And I guess there wasn’t anyone there?” Danny mused.

“Not really.” Steve cleared his throat. When he glanced at Danny out of the corner of his eye, he saw the man watching him with a mix of concern and intrigue. “I mean, there was a little experimentation. - That’s how I knew I…. You know?” he waved vaguely at his surroundings. “But it wasn’t like you could go out with a guy. Make out in the hallways between classes. - Go to prom together.” He sighed regretfully. Though that had more to do with the fact that he’d missed out on prom, having chosen to skip it.

Danny nodded understandingly. “And no one after you got out?”

Steve swallowed, turning his back to the dance floor and lowering his gaze to the bar, shaking his head. He couldn’t tell Danny the truth. Couldn’t risk someone over hearing him and telling NCIS. Not when he was this close to fulfilling his dream. – His father’s dream. What the hell was he even doing here? He asked himself again, only for the question to be washed away by Danny’s deep grumpy voice.

“Probably for the best. Relationships suck anyway. They always end up in pain and misery.”

Steve looked at him sadly. “Careful there Danny, you sound bitter.”

Danny focused on drinking his beer for a few silent seconds, while Steve focused on _not_ focusing on Danny drinking.

“So, this brings us back to you hanging with me at the bar when you should be out there.” Danny lowered the bottle and nodded to the dance floor, where the sea of male bodies were grinding and rubbing up against each other in a primal display that said I’m ready and willing.

“We’ve got an agreement.” Steve reminded him, trying not to make it obvious that the idea of leaving Danny’s side was as unappealing as three weeks in isolation. “No one’s caught my eye yet.” _Except you, sadly_.

“Right.” Danny huffed, disbelievingly. “No one? What about that guy.” He pointed across the bar to a young blond twenty-something.

Steve followed Danny’s finger, shaking his head. “Not my type.”

“He’s blond, short and hot. - I guess. I’m not an expert. - That seemed you’re type twenty minutes ago.” Danny smirked smugly at Steve’s questioning look. “What? You confessed to hitting on me.” Danny grinned. “And you don‘t hit on people you don‘t find attractive.” he added arrogantly.

Steve rolled his eyes. “He’s too young.”

“Are you insinuating I’m not?” Danny growled, insulted, “I’ll have you know I’m only just twenty eight.”

“Really?” Steve smirked; giving Danny the once over, which resulted in the man punching him in the shoulder. “I’m a cop. It’s stressful.”

“A cop?” Steve asked, intrigued. “Beat?”

Danny shook his head. “Detective.”

“Detective Danny….? What was it?”

“No surnames.” Danny shook his head. “For both our sakes.” Steve watched him for a long moment before nodding. “What about that guy?” Danny asked in a swift change of subject. “Blonde. Older than twenty….not sure if you’d consider him hot but…he seems cute enough I guess.”

Steve turned to take in the tall slim blond dancing flamboyantly across the room. “No….too…” he cleared his throat. “Clearly a catcher.”

He could feel Danny’s eyes burning into his face like gunfire. “And you’re….?”

Steve shrugged nonchalantly. “Sometimes. - Depends on the guy. - And the mood.” Of course, he’d only ever been with one guy and yeah, he’d been the one doing the fucking, but that didn’t mean the idea of being on the bottom was unappealing.

“And you’re in the mood to….” Danny shifted again. “Okay. Have to say, didn’t see that coming. I guess I’m buying into the clichés again. So we’re looking for a short, blond, hot, pitcher.” He murmured with amusement.

Steve turned to see Danny chuckling to himself. “What?”

“Nothing.” he waved his hand dismissively.

“What? Come on Danny.”

“It’s nothing. - Just…Okay, I might have, maybe…played baseball in high school.”

Steve erupted into laughter. “Do I even want to ask what position?”

“Short-stop. Don‘t even.” Danny warned with a pointed finger and a chuckle.

“But…?” Steve pressed, because he could hear the _but_ in there.

“I was a pitcher for half a season when my pal Joey busted his pinky.”

Choking on his beer was not Steve’s most attractive moment, he knew, but god how could he not. The universe was out to punish him. It had to be, how else did you explain Danny? He jolted as Danny slapped his hand against Steve’s back.

“You okay there babe?”

“Fine.” Steve croaked, a shiver travelling through him.

“You sure are.” Said a voice from behind them. Steve turned to see a guy a little taller than him, dirty blond hair, big blue eyes and a smirk that promised so much. Steve swallowed thickly and glanced over to see Danny’s head bowed, trying to be invisible in light of Steve’s apparent good fortune. “You wanna dance?” the guy asked.

“Uh…I’m not really the dancing type.” Steve replied with a slight stutter. “Ouch.” He grunted as he felt an elbow in his ribs. He turned sharply to see Danny glaring, nodding for him to go.

“You sure?” the stranger pressed, smirking, glancing between them. “I mean, your boyfriend doesn’t seem to mind.”

“I’m not…”

“Yeah. I’m sure.” Steve nodded. “Sorry.”

“Well if you change your mind, come find me.” The guy winked, “Either of you.”

“What the hell? You’re here to get laid. That guy clearly wanted to do the honours. Why the hell are you still standing here?” Danny scolded, hands flying around in frustration.

“I don’t dance.” Steve stated matter-of-factly.

“So you come to a dance club.” Danny frowned, shaking his head disbelievingly.

“It’s not like there are many gay cafés or pubs. It’s a club or nothing.” He grumbled. The truth though, was even if there were other options, he’d still have come to a club, because it’s safer. There was less chance of him getting spotted. Turning, he chugged the last of his beer and ordered something stronger, ignoring the frustrated glare Danny was shooting at him.

“Were you dropped on your head as a baby? Seriously, 'cause you‘re clearly defective, Steven.”

Steve turned, brow raised. The name sending a shot of arousal down to his groin. He was so fucked.

Danny shook his head. “I know what you're doing.”

“And what’s that?” He asked breathlessly, sipping at his scotch.

“You’re hoping to recruit me to your side of the fence.”

Steve choked on a laugh, even as a dark voice in the back of his mind agreed. “Am I indeed?”

“Yeah. You’re waiting for me to either get really drunk so you can have your wicked way with me in some dingy bathroom, or you’re hoping I cave under the curiosity.”

“ _Are_ you curious?” Steve asked, twisting his body to face the other man, lip curling teasingly.

“No.” Danny shook his head.

“Never?”

“No.”

“Not even a little bit?” Steve’s voice dropped to a seductive level and he leaned his body slightly closer to Danny.

Danny stared up at him, eyes narrowing dangerously. “Are you trying to use your freaky army brain-washing powers on me?”

“Navy. - The only thing I’m using against you is my natural good looks and charm.” He laughed, relaxing once again into their flirtation.

“I thought we’d established, you don’t have charm.” Danny pointed out, sounding suddenly breathless.

“When did we establish that?” Steve said huskily, leaning in a little more.

“Twenty-five minutes ago when you first tried to seduce me.”

Steve shrugged. “I wasn’t bringing my A-game.”

“This is you’re A-game?” Danny scoffed dismissively.

Steve took a step closer, till his chest was brushing at Danny’s arm. “More like B, I’m building up slowly.”

Danny stared at him, face contorted into some mix of lust, curiosity, fear and anger. Steve didn’t actually believe it would work. Guys didn’t just change their sexuality on a dime, and neither could a straight guy be seduced, and Danny had made it _very_ clear he was straight. He’d told Steve more than once in the hour they’d been stood together that he wasn’t gay. That he wasn’t interested.

But there was a part of Steve that couldn’t help but see it as a challenge. One he was determined to succeed in passing. Danny was… Well, Danny was incredible. “You said you wanted to forget.” Steve whispered, his lips close to Danny’s ear.

“I’m _not_ gay?”

“How do you know unless you try?” Steve felt his stomach tighten. There was a voice in the back of his head telling him to stop pushing. That it wasn’t fair. That he was being an asshole, but there was something between them. A connection, and Steve didn't want to miss the only chance they'll ever have. After all he was heading back to Virginia tomorrow, he’d never see Danny again. If he didn’t at least try, he’d always wonder.

Danny didn’t turn his head. Didn’t look at him. Didn’t say anything. He just stared down at his beer, hands trembling slightly. Then he waved his hand at the bartender and ordered three tequila shots.

He downed each of them in quick succession, then waved for another three, which he also threw back. Steve stared at him, confused and concerned, but before Steve could voice an apology, Danny’s hand blazed against the back of Steve’s neck as he was yanked down into a hot, awkward kiss.

Steve pulled away to stare down at Danny with wide shocked eyes. He didn’t know what he’d expected to see written across the other man’s face. He knew what he’d liked to have seen, a bright grin and a glint of desire. Instead what he found was nothing. Utter blankness as the man stared up at him, mouth pressed into a thin line.

“I shouldn’t have pushed. Sorry Danny.” He glanced over at the dance floor. “I…. It was nice talking to you.” He smiled tightly, then stepped away from the bar towards the dance floor, a heavy weight of guilt, regret and humiliation in his gut.

___(*o*)___

Steve tried not to look at, or even think of Danny while he stood with an attractive brunette, but more often than not his eyes would be drawn over to the bar where Danny was still sat, throwing back drinks. He watched him wave off any guy that so much as said hello, before shooting Steve a glance across the room. Each time, Steve would turn back to the man in front of him, forcing himself to seem interested in what the guy was saying.

Steve felt the burn of guilt in his gut at the way he’d behaved. He’d known Danny was straight, and yet he’d pushed. He’d never thought he’d be _that_ guy. The one bent on corrupting innocent straight guys for his own sordid ends, but Danny was just….kind of irresistible.

He became aware that his companion was saying something, and he laughed. He had no idea if what the guy had said was funny, and frankly he didn’t much care. He was too busy watching Danny throw back his fifth scotch and slip of his stool. On unsteady legs, Danny headed for the restrooms, unaware of the bulky dark haired guy following him.

All Steve’s alarms went off, and without so much as an excuse me, he was forcing his way through the throng of people.

He burst into the restroom five seconds later to find Danny swinging for tall, dark and creepy. Danny’s fist connecting with the man’s face, but with the man’s bulk he just shook it off and advanced. Logically Steve knew that Danny could take care of himself, he was a detective. He was trained to deal with people larger and stronger than him, but then Danny was usually sober, right? And would have back up.

With that in mind, Steve stepped forward and grabbed the asshole by the shoulder, yanking him away from Danny violently. When the guy spun around to swing for him, Steve used all his SEAL training to block the attack and lay the guy out flat and unconscious on the restroom floor.

“You didn’t need to do that!” Danny yelled furiously, eyes blazing,. “I can take care of my fucking self.”

“I know that. I was… - Danny, you’re drunk.”

“I’m _not_ drunk.” He replied sharply, jaw clenched tightly.

“Really?” Steve crossed his arms. “Say Peter piper picked a peck of pickled pepper.” he challenged.

“Peter pepper pecked a….oh fuck off.” Danny pushed himself away from the wall he’d been shoved into and stepped over his unconscious attacker, heading for the door.

“Danny?” Steve pulled lightly on the man’s arm, ignoring the thrill that rippled through him at the thickness of Danny’s bicep. “Maybe you should go home.”

Danny turned, glaring furiously, “Why don’t you just leave me the fuck alone? - Go back to your jailbait!”

“He’s not jailbait. He’s twenty six.” Steve glowered defensively.

“Whatever.” Danny huffed, marching to the door.

Steve stopped him again. God knows why. “Look if you’re pissed because of….what I did. I’m sorry okay, I shouldn’t have….”

“What?” Danny snapped, turning on him with wide furious eyes, “Made me an offer only to renege on it five seconds later.”

Steve gaped at him, eyes searching, “Danny…? Look, I know… You’re not in a good place right now and I took advantage. You’re vulnerable right now. I shouldn’t have pushed like I did.”

“Advantage? Vulnerable?” Danny scoffed.

“Danny?”

“I’m not fucking…. _Fuck_.” Danny didn’t finish whatever it was he was going to say. Instead he took a firm grip on Steve’s t-shirt and yanked him down into another kiss.

This time there was no discomfort, just determination and blazing hunger. Steve tried to pull away, but Danny wouldn’t let up, and before Steve even realize what he was doing he was surrendering. Great SEAL he was going to be.

Steve took hold of Danny’s hips and pushed him back against the restroom door. Their mouths never leaving one another. Danny’s hold on Steve’s shirt eased and the man’s hand slid up to press against the side of Steve’s neck, while Steve’s hands skimmed over Danny’s hip, before tugging at his shirt. Desperate to touch skin. Danny moaned into his mouth when he finally succeeded.

They stood there for what felt like hours, kissing greedily. Hands all over each other. Hips grinding together in a frantic quest for satisfaction. They probably would have stayed like that all night, but someone started banging on the door, bursting the bubble. Steve pulled away, panting, to stare down at Danny’s flushed face with shock. “Danny?”

The shorter man shoved him away and Steve’s stomach twisted violently. He dropped his gaze, staring at his boots as shame once again flooded in. He shouldn’t have let that go one. He should have stopped it, but he’d wanted to kiss Danny so bad. Danny was the thing he’d been looking for. He was what he was risking all this for.

Only the man didn’t feel the same. He was heartbroken over his divorce, he was lost, and most importantly he was drunk. Steve heard the door open, and looked up to see three men rush in. None of them paying any attention to him and Danny, or the unconscious guy on the floor. Steve stared at them for a long moment, before he felt firm callused fingers yanking on his wrist, dragging him out of the room.

“Danny?”

“Shut up, Steven.” The man ordered firmly, leading Steve through the club, passed the young guy he’d been talking to not ten minutes ago, and straight out the door. Outside in the cool night air, Danny gave a high pitched whistle and waved a hand. A moment later a cab was drawing up to the curb. “I’m assuming you’ve got a hotel room?”

Steve frowned down at him for a long moment. “Not one I can take you back to.”

Danny exhaled a frustrated sigh, shaking his head as he continued to yank open the cab door, leaning inside to talk to the driver. “You up for a trip to Jersey?”

“It’ll cost you?”

Danny nodded, sliding into the backseat. He turned his head to stare expectantly up at Steve. “You in or out?”

Steve stood there weighing his options for a few moments. The honourable part of him demanded that he leave. That Danny wasn’t in the right frame of mind to be making rash decisions about sex. That they’d both regret it come morning. That this was the king of bad ideas.

However, there was a loud, more insistent voice that insisted he get his damn ass in the cab and make the most of his last night of freedom. It wasn’t as if he was going to have to face Danny in the morning, right? Or ever see him again. – That thought didn’t feel him with any sort of ease. The idea of never seeing this amazing man again instead filled him with a heavy sorrow. In just the few hours they’d known each other, Steve could already envision his whole future with Danny.

 _Well, you can’t have future, but you can have one night._ His mind insisted loudly.

“I’m not waiting all night.” Danny snapped, eyes burning with determination.

Steve gave the man a sharp nod and hurriedly climbed into the cab. They didn’t speak or even look at one another during their journey from Hell’s Kitchen to Jersey. Steve sat there, his whole body feeling as if it were on fire while he stared out of the window at the passing city. It felt like eternity before they were pulling up outside a shitty apartment complex.

“This is where you’re staying?” Steve asked, looking up at the place while Danny paid the driver.

“It's all I can afford.” Danny murmured, marching past Steve to the main door.

Steve followed him up the three flights of stairs, silently wondering what the hell he was doing. Sure this had been exactly what he’d planned when he’d ditched his buddies, but… well there was something about Danny, something that made this all feel more…significant.

They paused outside a room while Steve watched Danny root around in his pockets for his keys. “Danny, are you sure about this?” The shorter man didn’t answer, too busy yanking his keys free of his pocket.

Steve hovered on the threshold for a few minutes, inhaling through his nose. When he stepped nervously inside, he found Danny waiting for him. Carefully he gently closed the door, never taking his eyes off the other man. He licked at his lips as Danny stood there watching him. If the blonde really wanted this, he was going to have to make the first move. - And he certainly did.

Steve’s back hit the door hard enough to make his head bounce off it. Danny’s hand pulling him down by the front of his shirt. Steve could hear the fabric splitting but didn’t care. Instead he cradled the man’s face and gave himself over to the heat of Danny’s deep filthy kiss.

Everything seemed to happen in a blur after that, all Steve was aware of was the warmth of the other man’s hands, the feel of a very evident cock pressing into his thigh. He blindly gripped at fabric, tearing at it when it didn’t give away instantly. There was the distant sound of rain, then the jingle of his belt.

Steve gasped as thick rough fingers curled around his length, his eyes rolling back into his head. _Oh God,_ it had been so long since he felt a firm touch that wasn’t his own.

“Fuck Danny!” Steve groaned loudly, his fingers biting into the shorter man’s shoulder as he thrust into Danny’s grip.

Danny let out his own moan, his mouth working at Steve’s throat as he jerked him of.

“More.” Steve panted, “I need so much more. It’s been so long.” He twisted his head, using one of his hands to pull Danny’s mouth to his. They kissed messily, then Steve was switching their positions before Danny so much as let out a squeak of protect. Pushing the man back against the door, Steve dropped to his knees. He worked quickly to free Danny of his pants, then looked up at Danny, waiting for permission.

At Danny’s nod, Steve took him into his mouth, right up to the hilt. He could feel Danny’s pre-cum painting the back of his throat and he hummed around the thick member. Savouring the perfection of it all.

“Ah, fucking hell, Steven.” Danny yelled, fingers tightening into the knelling man’s hair.

Steve’s answer was to relax his jaw further and look up at Danny with silent encouragement. There was a moment’s hesitation, but then Danny was fucking into his mouth with reckless abandon, the man’s fingers tightening in Steve’s hair with each thrust.

Steve hadn’t felt so alive in years. Hadn’t felt so happy. He loved being in the Navy, will love being a SEAL, and protecting his country. It was just a shame he had to sacrifice this in order to do so. It seemed so unfair. His friends didn’t have to give up the chance of love in order to serve, but him? Oh, no. He had to make a decision. He wasn’t allowed both.

Well, he’d take tonight. One night with this incredible, beautiful man.

“Ah!” Danny gasped, yanking Steve off his cock. “I-If you don’t stop, I’m not going to be any use to you.” He panted, looking down at Steve and his glistening swollen lips.

“Don’t worry about me.” Steve replied roughly, hungry eyes flickering back to the man’s cock, “I…”

“You wanted to get fucked tonight, didn’t you?” Danny asked, forcing Steve to look at him again. “That’s why you weren’t interested in those other guys?”

Steve shook his head, “I wasn’t interested because all I wanted was you.”

Danny growled, yanking Steve until he was back on his feet, then he pulled him back into a kiss. Their cocks teased one another as the made out against the apartment door.

“Bedroom?” Steve asked breathlessly between kisses.

Danny jerked his head towards the couch, then began to shuffle them both in its direction, tossing the tattered remains of his shirt away.

“No bed?” Steve frowned.

Reluctantly Danny took a step away, pushing Steve out of the way to he could throw the sofa cushions aside, then reach down to yank the folded bed from inside the sofa. The sheets still clung in a tangled mess to the flimsy mattress.

Steve frowned, taking a seat on it’s so as to unlace his boots and throw them in the corner. When he stood again, he kicked off his cargo pants and underwear, his eyes watching Danny as he mirrored each action.

When they were both naked, they stared at one another for a few tense seconds, then Danny was on him again, kissing him, fingers wrapping around his cock once more. “I don’t know what I’m doing?”

Steve moaned into the man’s throat. He wasn’t going to tell him that he didn’t either. “Lube. Pocket.” He said instead.

It only took a few seconds for Danny to lean down and grab his pants, holding them up while Steve fumbled with one of the many pockets, retrieving the small bottle of lube and a strip of condoms.

“You were confident.” Danny huffed, letting the pants fall to the ground and reaching for the supplies.

Steve laughed, shrugging. He turned away, crawling up onto the crappy bed, ass on display. “Use as much lube as you can, it’s been a while.” He informed huskily, looking at Danny over his shoulder.

The other man’s eyes flickered over the expanse of pale firm flesh that made up Steve’s ass, his tongue trailing over his lips as if he were a child in an ice cream shop. A shiver shot down Steve’s spine and he let out a quiet moan. “Danny?”

The sound of the cap being flipped echoed around the room, followed by the rather unappealing sound of gloop being squeezed free. Steve pulled Danny’s pillows down, placing then beneath his hips. His heart raced, and then flew into his throat as Danny brushed at his enterence with a wet finger.

“Are you okay?” Danny asked, freezing.

“Fine.” Steve moaned, “It’s just cold. Keep going, I can take it.”

Danny did as ordered, rolling his finger around the tight ring of muscle before attempting to push inside. Steve dropped his head into his folded arms and groaned. It hurt a little but he channelled the pain into a deep dark corner of his mind, just as he’d been trained to do.

One finger soon became two, then three. Steve closed his eyes and buried his nose into the sheets, taking in Danny’s scent and using it to anchor him. Then the fingers were gone and Steve heard the sound of foil being torn.

His body jerked at the first press of Danny’s cock, but he clenched his teeth and held still.

“Steven?” Danny asked, that hint of concern back in his voice.

“Keep going, D.”

And he did. Inch by inch Danny pushed into him, spreading him open. It felt…incredible. Breathtakingly perfect.

“Fuck, Steve.” Danny moaned into his back, the man’s fingers gripping hard at his hip. “So tight. God, you feel… fuck, I didn’t know….”

Steve reached back, finding Danny’s fingers and giving them a squeeze as he pushed himself back onto Danny’s cock in one swift movement, until the man was buried fully inside him. The action causing them both to let out loud yells of pleasure.

They stilled for a few seconds, the pair each adjusting to the intense feelings rippling through them, the heat of their bodies pressed against each other causing sweat to pool. Then Danny began to move, slowly withdrawing, before thrusting back with just as much caution. He repeated the action a couple of times before Steve few frustrated. He was too desperate for slow and gentle. “Let go.” He muttered against his shoulder, meeting Danny’s eyes, “Just let go, Danny.”

For a second Danny froze, staring at him in confusion. Steve clenched his ass, causing the muscles to grip Danny tighter and grinned when the man let out a pained desperate moan. “Let go, Babe.” Steve ordered firmly, and that was all the encouragement Danny needed.

Danny built up the pace, thrusting into him faster and harder, and nails biting into Steve’s flesh. The mattress groaned almost as much as they did, and Steve held onto the sheets as he met each thrust.

The room was filled with the sound of damp flesh slapping, the metallic cry of the sofa, and the pleasured moans and pants of the two men, until finally Steve let out a loud yell, cum coating Danny’s pillows. The blonde followed three thrusts later, burying himself deep inside Steve as he shot his load.

Then they both collapsed onto their backs, eyes closed as they came down.

\\__(*_*)__/

Steve moaned softly and rolled into the heated body beside him, his hand sliding over the warm skin, fingertips tingling from the gentle brush of hair. Pressing his nose into the curve of Danny’s neck, he inhaled deeply, his body utterly relaxed for the first time in years. Sleep almost beginning to drag him back down.

His eyes snapped open in an instant, the realization of where he was slamming into him. He stared at the back of Danny’s head and shoulder as he reluctantly untangled himself from the other man, hoping not to wake him. A heavy weight of regret slowly taking hold. – It wasn’t that he regretted the night before, at least not in the sense of wishing he’d stayed with his friends, but rather in the terms of regretting he wouldn’t get to spend more time with the man. That this was their one and only night together.

With his arm free, Steve shifted to the edge of the bed, swinging his legs over the side and ran a hand down his face before reaching for his watch. **6 am**. He was due to meet with Freddy and the others to head back to base at oh-seven-hundred. For the first time since his teens, Steve physically dreaded returning the Navy. Glancing over his shoulder, he stared at the sleeping man, his chest aching. He didn’t want to leave, but he knew realistically he couldn’t stay. Not only because the Navy was his life, and he’d given up all rights to true happiness when he’d enlisted. Because there was something more important, a higher calling. It was in his blood to heed that call.

But also because in all likelihood Danny was going to wake up hating himself, and Steve. There wasn’t a future for them, it was just a one night stand. A perfect one night stand.

Closing his eyes, Steve inhaled deeply and shoved the covers away, getting slowly to his feet. He didn’t look at Danny again, just concentrated on dressing. Too scared of what he might do if he turned his gaze behind him. Scared of his own selfish desires. Instead he kept his eyes fixed on his clothes as he dragged on his underwear, cargos and t-shirt. Telling himself every second that it had all been a moment of madness. That the detective had just wanted a distraction from his troubled life. An escape from reality. It had meant nothing to Danny, so it couldn’t mean anything to him.

He exhaled the breath he’d been holding and turned; forgetting for a moment his vow not to look at the other man. Not to memorize this moment. A sharp pain shot through his chest, making him wince. _You can’t stay, Steve. You’ve worked too hard to throw it all away on a guy who’ll probably hate you when he opens his eyes._

Steve sighed regretfully. Knowing his logical mind was speaking sense. Somewhat wishing he’d never entered that bar. Never met Danny. His gaze lingers for another few seconds before turning his back on the bed and heading for the door. Opening and closing it as silently as he could. Knowing he’d _never_ see the man again.

\\__(*_*)__/

Steve sat in the back of the people carrier they’d hired, his head angled to stare out the window, ignoring the easy banter around him. The previous night was still haunting him, Danny’s face hovering in his minds eye, taunting him. There was a heavy weight on his chest that hadn’t been there before, and it was suffocating him. He’d carried a lot of weight over the last couple of years, but none of it had felt this crushing.

“Steve!”

He turned his head quickly at the sound of his friend’s voice, meeting the man’s amused brown eyes. “Yeah?”

“You okay man?” Baker chuckled, his hands never leaving the wheel.

“Fine.”

“Must have been a hell of a girl.” the man laughed rigorously; eyeing him intently via the rear-view mirror.

Steve didn’t fail to note Freddy’s raised brow and felt his stomach tighten. He wished he could share, but regs wouldn’t allow him. No matter how much he trusted his best friend with his life, he couldn’t trust him with….his secret.

Thankfully, Freddy had planned to meet up with his girl, meaning that Steve was meant to be sharing a hotel room with Baker, who apparently hadn’t made it back to their room either. He’d foolishly thought he’d be able to just brush the night off by saying he hit the bars then went back alone, but Baker had spotted the hickey on Steve’s neck.

“Well, come on. Spill. Hottie?” Rodriguez pressed.

“Gorgeous.” Steve answered honestly; a small smile tugging at his lips. He tried desperately to ignore the deep pool of guilt in his gut.

“Want to elaborate?” Baker asked.

“No.” Steve replied firmly. Turning to focus his gaze at the passing highway, Freddy’s eyes burning into the side of his face light ballistic missiles.

“Oh _come on_ man. We told you about our girls.” Rodriguez huffed; twisting further in his seat to he was practically hanging between the two front seats.

“Yeah, but I didn’t ask for it.” Steve countered lightly; shooting his friend a smirk. “You guys just don’t understand the term over-sharing.” he chuckled. Continuing to ignore the burn of Freddy’s stare.

“Well we’re asking, so give us something, man.” Rodriguez continued to pressed; practically falling off his seat.

Steve rolled his eyes. “Blonde.”

Rodriguez beamed like an excited puppy, causing Steve to chuckle even more, rolling his eyes at the group of men.

“A mouth to die for.” Steve added with a laugh.

He knew his comrades would take his comment in the biblical sense, and he didn’t much care, ‘cause that was partly true. But what Steve loved most was the easy banter they’d fallen into almost from the second they met. Like they’d known one another all their lives.

Baker and Rodriguez both laughed while Freddy sat watching him closely.

“What’s her name?” Baker asked over his shoulder from the driver’s seat.

“Danny.” Steve said instinctively, then looked horrified until he remembered the name had been adopted by more than a few girls. He released a sigh of relief and slouched back into his seat, smiling ridiculously out the window once more.

“Aw, look the boy’s in love.” Rodriguez laughed; twisting back to face the road.

Steve’s heart stopped. _Shit_.

\\__(*_*)__/

Honolulu, Hawaii. 2010

Steve slipped into the backseat of the cab, his gaze flickering around the crowded beach. He wanted to see that head of blond hair again, while at the same time hoping never to see it. It brought back too many memories. As the taxi carried him away from Kapiolani, he let his memory wander.

\\__(*_*)__/

_Cambodia, 2005_

Steve stared out of the chopper, the wind catching at his hair. His brothers around him, laughing. Relaxed despite the danger they were heading into. He knew his mind should be focused on the mission ahead, but all he could think about was Danny. As always. He’d added another letter to the pile in his footlocker. A white envelope with just a name and the address of a tacky motel in New Jersey. If anything happened to him, they’d be delivered. The ones to his father and sister had been sat there for years now. He’d never expected to be adding another letter. Ever.

He knew it was probably weird to write a goodbye letter to a complete stranger. A one night stand. But Danny hadn’t been just a one night stand. In the month and a half since that night, he hadn’t been able to forget the man. Reliving that night in the privacy of his dreams, where the long arm of the military couldn’t touch him. Couldn’t deny him what he wanted. 

Steve did regret one thing. Not getting Danny’s full name. It would have made things easier, but then, maybe it was better this way.

With just that one word, the man was like some magical spirit, not completely real. Steve wouldn’t be tempted to go looking for him. Wouldn’t be tempted to turn his back on everything. Danny was just a beautiful fantasy he got to carry around with him for the rest of his days. He could build a perfect life with him, all in the safety of his dreams.

That hadn’t stopped him considering calling in a favour to help him track Danny down though. How many blond haired, blue eyed detectives called Danny could there be in New Jersey? - Probably thousands, that was the problem, he didn’t have that much to go on. He knew he had a kid and was going through a divorce, but he had no names. It was as if Danny had made damn sure Steve would never find him again.

\\__(*_*)__/

Honolulu, Hawaii. 2010

Steve strolled back into his small hotel room with a sigh. He wasn’t there to relax after a stress filled day full of painful memories. He’d just returned to change out of his uniform before he headed over to his family home. He had to look for evidence. Try and figure out just where Hesse had gone.

So he dropped the key on the dresser and began to cautiously strip off his jacket and tie as he strolled towards the bed. Peeling away the layers, he laid them neatly. Running his hand over the starched folds of his uniform blazer, he heaved another weary sigh. Tears once again stinging at his eyes. Wondering why he’d waited so long to come home.

Swallowing the pain, Steve left his uniform and headed for the bathroom, stripping off his underwear as he walked. He turned on the water and stepped in without waiting for it to warm.

He always waited too long, and it always led to him losing things. His father was just the latest casualty of his stubbornness and career.

His thoughts were once again drawn back to Danny. That stranger. That fleeting night. Leaving had been the hardest thing he’d ever done in his life. Which was strange, considering he’d only known the man a few hours. It had almost killed him. But his career was everything to him, then _and_ now. He’d had a job to do. Then another and another. It had been almost a year and a half before Steve had the opportunity to return to New Jersey.

\\__(*_*)__/

_New Jersey. 2006._

He hadn’t really planned this out. Not a single moment of it. He’d just walked off base and grabbed the first flight to New Jersey. It wasn’t until he was walking through the apartment complex corridor that it even occurred to Steve that Danny might not be there. After all it had been a year. No-one stayed in such a shit-hole for a year. That hadn’t stopped him trying the door though.

He raised his hand and gave a sharp knock, then waited anxiously, his heart racing like he was going through SEAL training all over again. He could feel the sweat pooling in his palms and he flexed his twitchy fingers.

When the door finally opened, it was to the sight of a large rounded, balding man in his forties. Steve’s stomach plummeted painfully. “Sorry, wrong room.” He announced quickly; turning his back on the door. Of course Danny wouldn’t be there. Of course he’d left. - Of course Steve had lost him.

\\__(*_*)__/

Honolulu, Hawaii. 2010

Steve stepped out of the shower and grabbed his fresh civilian clothes; dressing quickly. His mind still trapped in the past.

When he’d lost Danny he’d buried himself in his career. Trying harder and harder to forget about the man. He’d even done the one thing he’d sworn to himself he’d _never_ do. He’d started dating a woman.

It became pretty clear after that first trip that Freddy knew, and by the way he’d practically thrown Catherine at him, his best friend wasn’t all that accepting of Steve’s….secret. Which hurt, deeply.

But it wasn’t just Freddy. The rest of the unit pressed him about Danny for months, then quickly moved on to _‘Come on McGarrett, plenty more fish in the sea’._ Dragging him out to bars, watching him intently as he charmed women left and right. Leaving with a few only to show them to a cab the second they were out of the view of his ‘friends’.

It was obvious that the only way to quiet everyone was to at least look like he was settling down. - And Catherine was a nice woman. Sweet. And not as dumb as Freddy seemed to think she was. It hadn’t taken her three minutes to see right through him. He’d expected her to lose it, but surprisingly she seemed okay with their relationship being simply a show and tell thing. She told Steve she was sympathetic to his plight because her best friend through basic training had been dishonourably discharged for the same so-called indiscretion, and it wasn’t as if she wanted a relationship. - Steve suspected there was more to it, but didn’t push. He knew the least said the safer for everyone. So they carried on the charade.

Still were in fact. - But it was getting harder. Steve couldn’t say why exactly. He was just beginning to feel restless. More than he ever had before, and now with both his father, and Freddy’s deaths he wasn’t sure he wanted to keep lying.

Glancing over to his uniform he sighed sadly. As much as he hated lying about who he was, he couldn’t just leave the Navy. It was his life. His soul. It had cost him too much to just walk away. - And it wasn’t as if he had anywhere to go, or any reason to stay.

\\__(*_*)__/

Steve ducked quickly under the yellow police tape, taking a deep breath, filling his lungs, before dragging his flick knife down the seal and twisting the knob. He didn’t want to be there. At least not now.

The whole place was dark, the heady stench of blood hanging heavy in the air. The fact that it was his father’s, sliced through him; causing him to quickly blink back tears before switching on the forensic lights. Smelling the blood wasn’t half as bad as seeing it. Suddenly he was back in that field. That gunshot ringing in his ears.

Shaking the memory off, he moved around the house focusing solely on his job. After finding the palm print on his father’s desk and the bloody footprint on the polished wooden floor; Steve headed into the garage. The scent of sawdust and car grease instantly brought with it a flood of memories. He inhaled deeply as he threw back the dust cover on his father’s old Marquis and smiled sadly down at it. He’d spent many happy hours in the backseat of the car as a kid. He’d always thought he have all his most important teenage moments in it, but the death of his mother had ended that.

Turning, Steve caught sight of his father’s old tool box. The word Champ screaming at him. His father’s words repeating over and over in his head. His father had never called him Champ. Not once. It had to be a clue. But to what?

He was sorting through the contents when he heard movement in the house. Closing the box he reached for his weapon just as the door opened and a loud, hauntingly familiar voice broke the silence. He turned slowly; his gun pulled just in case his mind was playing tricks. It wasn’t. He drank in the sight of the man he’d never been able to forget. “Danny?”

**Author's Note:**

> I do plan as follow-up, I’m just not sure when it’ll get finished/posted, as Christmas is around the corner and I already have three story in progress. I hope you enjoyed this however. See you again soon, either with the follow-up, or the next in my Let’s Start With A Happy Ending series.


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